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Urgent Help and advice needed regarding relationship with blind person!!

Hi
I am a sighted person interested in a blind guy since the past many years. I tried everything to get closer to him as heard that blind people don't trust others easily. I invited him out for coffee, to discuss business plan etc,no reply. So I calmed down and stopped chasing him.
Recently, I contacted him again when a friend of mine told me that she saw him in town. I contacted him on facebook as he is in my friends there, to go somewhere for coffee. And after two three messages he replied back and we agreed to meet at a cafe. I was looking forward to the meeting, but was so nervous that he don't know what is in my heart,and what if he doesnot like me. Anyway, he stayed for coffee and after an hour asked for leave as he had to finish some work. Later on around 6pm I text him to let him know that I enjoyed the drinks and suggested that it would have been better if we stayed longer to know each other more. I got reply from him next day in the morning that he enjoyed it too and that he is going to another city to collect his documents!!
I discussed this with my friends and all of them said that it seems he is not interested and that I stop any further contact with him to avoid any more humiliation. My point is that maybe he was not comfortable with me as it was the first time we met each other personally and that I should try and contact him again.
Despite my friends advice I sent him a message on facebook again asking about his trip etc. No reply yet. I want to ask the other people who are on this forum what should I do now? Whether I keep on contacting him and asking him out or just drop the idea considering maybe he is not liking me?
please help, this is something very important for me.
thanks
sasha

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Re: Urgent Help and advice needed regarding relationship with blind person!!



This reply is more to any in future who might come across this topic in a google search and read through the thread. A. Blind men are no different from sighted men. B. When in doubt, stand in your power, take a risk, clearly express your interest, and then embrace the resultant relationship or move on if your feelings are not recipricated. C. Men are simple creatures. They are not simple minded. But, they are simple in their needs, wants and communication style. Be clear in your communication. Do not play games or expect them to be mind readers. D. in this specific situation, consider that A. he may be gay or B. he might be in a relationship already that doesn't appear on his Face Book statis. E. To the origional poster. If English is not your first language, then congradulations on your writing style, and rock that accent, whatever type you have, men and women, blind and sighted love accents. But, if English is not your second language, then, please learn to proof-read and improve your grammar. If you are a speaker of another language, people won't fault your English and your writing, but if you are not, then you will be judged as unintelligent or lazy for your writing if the above examples are any indication. Because I do not know you or your situation I offer both of those lines of thought, because either or neither may be applicable. Hopefully this is helpful to someone somewhere. I offer it up to that end.


Re:Urgent Help and advice needed regarding relationship with blind person!!



A big thankyou to all of you for the comments and advise.


Re:Urgent Help and advice needed regarding relationship with blind person!!



Good day sasha, i have to say you have demonstrated great patience and i am happy to hear that you put a time limit in waiting for him to respond to you. Life is to beautiful to waste on someone you is not appreciative of you. Have a great day :)


Re:Urgent Help and advice needed regarding relationship with blind person!!



Thanks for the replies.
I think I messed it up then by sending him detailed email!!!!
I have not got any reply yet so waiting for him to return back from his holiday. If no reply by valentine then its over from my side.
may god give me strength.



It's Rey



i don't really know much about the guy and if he is in a relation ship already? hmmm? I been blind for five years and I had experience meeting blind people . Alot of the blind people that are blind from birth are somewhat shy and keep to themselves, but that doesn't mean he doesn't want a relationship, maybe he has never been in a relation or been approached like you do. You have to make him feel really comfortable for him to open up to you . when you can accomplish that you can tell him your feelings. that is one of my issues if how comfortable I can feel with another . I


Re:Urgent Help and advice needed regarding relationship with blind person!!



Hello, I personally think you shouldn't contact him anymore. Blind men are like sighted men. There is no rewire in the brain that says dating responces in the brain will be different just because a person is blind. You've made it abundantly clear that you are more than interested and I agree further contact will make you look like a stalker. Plus I wouldn't believe all assumptions you may have heard from unreliable sources. Not all blind people are untrusting and hard to get close too. That is simply a stereotype put forth by rumor and false speculation.
Good Luck,
Nikki
http://playingtheblindcard.blogspot.com


Re:Urgent Help and advice needed regarding relationship with blind person!!



I did Mike. I sent him an email explaining everything, I think its better to tell him the reason of my contacting him and wait for an answer than waiting for reply while keeping him in dark about my likeness. there is no harm in trying, and no harm in letting other person know about our feelings, though whatever his reply, I respect it.
Thanks fo advise.
Sasha


Re:Urgent Help and advice needed regarding relationship with blind person!!



hi;
I guess if you're that wound up about it, just tell him straight out you want more than friendship. this will end any anxiety you continue to experience, and will in one way or another allow you to move forward with your life.
Mike


Re:Urgent Help and advice needed regarding relationship with blind person!!



Hi
Please I need more advise,can you kindly expalin what should I do and how to approach him in future,or just leave him?
Thanks
Sasha


Re:Urgent Help and advice needed regarding relationship with blind person!!



Thanks to both of you for kind replies.
I am a bit unsure as I really like this guy,and I want to be with him for the rest of my life,but after the first and last meeting I tried to contact him to hint for next meeting. I left messages on his face book messanger. I sent him text on his phone, and I got just one reply which I mentioned earlier.
My friends( all sighted) asked me to just trat him like any other guy and say if he wanted he would have responded to my messages,and no responce mean he is not interested.
They also say that my any further contact or messages would seem as if I am stalking him and will scare him as he don't know what and why I want to meet him. Can I be a bit brave and send him email explaining my feeling for him, ask him out and if no reply then just leave him???
Please advise. I am very confused and don't want to scare him off instead of attracting him.
Also I have not mentioned that he has a small business, and its not that he has no experiance of meeting people or lead a lonely life.


Re:Urgent Help and advice needed regarding relationship with blind person!!



Well If I were you, I would just tell him exactly ow you feel. People always assume that they have done enough hinting to let someone know your interested. Alot of things could be going on in his life, and unless you just come right out with it, you will always have doubts of your own. Life is short, finding real love is even harder. Be sure before walking away. Nothing lost but a bruised ego if he is not on your page. But if he is, how wonderful life will be for you both!
Alfred


Re:Urgent Help and advice needed regarding relationship with blind person!!



hi; i wouldn't expect pursuing a relationship with a blind person to be any different from anyone else. People are either in to you, or they're not. Sounds like you've contacted him enough to let your interest be known, so i'd recommend being patient and letting nature take its course. People can react as trying to hold water in your hand if you press too hard. the more tightly you close your fist, the more water escapes your fingers.
good luck to you.
Mike


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