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AFBAmerican Foundation®
for the Blind

Expanding possibilities for people with vision loss

Still Treated like a Child

I am nineteen and totally blind. I still live with my parents because I am a senior in high school. They still tell me what to do and they treat me like a child. How can I be rid of this? They don't even let me stay home for a night alone. I will be a music major at Jacksonville State in the fall. I am a member of Pariah Percussion Theatre http://www.pariahdrumline.com The Atlanta Pipe Band http://www.atlantapipeband.com and the Edmonton Strutters Drum and Bugle Corps. I will be in the orchestra or a band director as my profession. I am so sick of being led sided guide everywhere.

There are currently 8 replies


Re:Still Treated like a Child



Wow! You sure are doing a lot and keeping busy. That is great that you are continuing your studies and able to persue your goals at the same time.

Could it be that it is difficult for your parents to realize that their "baby" is now growing up? Sometimes parents forget and need to be reminded in a nice way that independence is necessary at your age so that you can continue to grow. I'm sure that they are very proud of you and want you to continue.

Good luck in your future endeavors.


Re:Still Treated like a Child



I'm sorry, that sucks. I know parents do it because they care about us, and I know they do, but it can be pretty frustrating. I've been pretty successful at showing my mom that I am independent, but even she sometimes does things that make me feel stupid. I'm a high school student too. My only advice is just to show them that you can do things on your own, which I'm sure you're saying "I've tried." Hang in there, its tough. And I think what the other response said is true too, try maybe talking to them, again easier said then done.


Re:Still Treated like a Child



Here's a hint: No matter who you are, no matter how old you get, parents always see their children as little kids most of the time. It's one of those irritating universal laws. Blindness may aggravate the situation, but it's not the root cause.

Yeah, it's kind of pathetic that they won't give you some space. Unless you're a pyro and you try to burn the house down regularly. You don't, do you? Some parents have a chronic need to be needed 24/7 and they don't realize how oppressive that can be, especially when they sincerely believe they're doing the right thing.

Anyway, hope things go better for you. Will you be staying at the dorms, at home, or what? My advice...aim for dorm life. It's an excellent compromise between living at home and total independence. That way, you don't feel like your being strangled by an umbilical cord and you finally get some room to be yourself. I'm not familiar with the school you mentioned, but any campus dorm worth its salt will be able to accomodate a visually impaired person with relative ease.


Re:Still Treated like a Child



Well, don't fight with your parents. Just do what they say, I know it's hard. try to have a meeting like i do with my mother each night or whenever you like. You could also try writing your parents a letter telling them how you feel. First, try to write to your mother. Also, things take time.


Re:Still Treated like a Child



just tell them how u feel.but don't yell, just act like u know what your saying


Re:Still Treated like a Child



It seems that the only resolution to this unfortunate situation would be to prove to your parents that you're capable of looking out for yourself. But, because of your disability, this may prove difficult. So, what I would suggest would be to garner your parents fear rather than their respect. You really need to freak them out, dude. For example, if you feel like taking a dump, just go right there on the living room floor. Have pets? Better start jerking those fuckers off. Mom's bitching at you to eat your asparagus? Hit that bitch with the fucking plate. You don't have to take that shit. When Dad gets up in your face call the cops and say he raped you. It really is this easy. Show those fuckers the difference between a blind person and a little kid. Sure, you may risk your life everytime you climb a set of stairs but you're a crazy motherfucker and you just took a shit on your dog.

But anyway, to get back to the matter at hand. Peer pressure is a terrible thing...and uh, don't do drugs unless you're in a loving relationship. Yeah....


Re:Still Treated like a Child



My name is Sarah. I am 16 years old. I have this very same problem. I'm not even allowed to go on a walk by myself. I have never even been to a fucking party! I know exactly what you are going through. It is just because they don't want to let you go. They are just being fucking protective like my family is.


Re: Still Treated like a Child



Hello!
Well I am a bit older, 32 old, but till the age of 19 old mainlly my mother worried about me, I was not allowed to walk with a cane. For secondary school I could learn among sighted, but my mates could not be my friends because someone alwais guided me from home to the school and back. The situation changed when my mother died from one day to the other and my familly realized that I was not earlier a child and they can trust me I can do a shopping, doing the work in the household, but my guidedog made these events faster because my sisters father and brother were not worried aboutme so much.
So guy, try to date as much girls as you can, and if you feel like just go away with a cane in your hands from home dont be afraid yo u will not know the way, and if may get lost you can use your mobilephone to ask for help.

Ohh and parties are great!:)


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