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AFBAmerican Foundation®
for the Blind

Expanding possibilities for people with vision loss

what would you be like without ______?

Hi everyone
Here's a question I've often pondered for my own soul searching purposes, wondering if anyone else has had the same kinds of thoughts. For me, it is related to being blind, though the question is not really limited to a specific disability.

How would you be different if you could see? ( (or, insert other disability/trait here)

When I was in college, i had a female friend who was really more like one of the guys. She was very attractive however, and we even kissed after a few nights of drinking together, but nothing beyond that.
She said to me on more than one occasion that she was glad I could not see. Because, (her words) I was a nice guy, and if I could see I'd probably be an a$$hole.
I asked her why, she said it was because of how I was built, and what Ilooked like. She said guys like that are almost always a$$holes.
At 21, I kind of laughed it off, but as I got older, I've given it more and more thought.
Maybe she's right. So much of what we experience shapes us as individuals, develops our character, and all the traits that make us our own unique little bags of protoplasm running around and doing what humans do.
I was a two sport athlete at Pitt without vision, so I don't think having vision would've change my wanting to be an athlete, I just would've played football instead. If the NFL didn't work out in my life with vision, then I would've considered the Marine core to pay for a medical degree. Perhaps i would've gone to desert storm and been killed. So many roads in life have altering effects, even those that may seem small in nature when they occur.
Maybe I would've been an a$$hole, who knows. I like to think with my family not changing, my religion... maybe i wouldn't be much different. I do think about how many wonderful people, including some on this site whom I've grown to know and been influenced by which wouldn't have happened if I could see. So who knows?

What do y'all think about yourselves, I'd be interested to hear other perspectives, similar lines of thought/experiences.
thank you for your time and lending your cortexes. *smile*

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Re: what would you be like without ______?

Hey Mike,
If someone asked me if I wanted surgery to repair my sight, I wouldn't take it. I think I'm a good person and I think I'm more down to earth then most people I know. I'm not sure if that's just because I'm blind or not, but I'm glad I can tell things how they are instead of sugar coating things.

Re: what would you be like without ______?

Hey There! Great question.
My mom and I were talking about this one night. I told her that I didn’t think my disabilities defined me, didn’t effect who I am. But, then I had to take that back. I think it has made me a much more compassionate, tolerant, and patient person than most others. Honestly, I can’t even imagine what my life would have been like had I not had any disabilities. I’d like to think I’d be the same person but I don’t know for sure.

If I was given the chance to be completely ‘healed’ and have no disabilities at all, I wouldn’t take it. I’d only take half, so I’d still be disabled but not as much. I think having a disability humbles you and makes you a better person as long as you don’t get caught up in self-pity. But in the end, I don’t think of ‘what if’ or ‘why me’. I’ve always thought of it that God chose me for this challenge for whatever reason He has. Whether or not, I’m living up to the challenge, I have no idea. I still have no idea what it is that I’m supposed to be doing with it. I always tell Him to speak up a little louder because I can’t hear Him. LOL!

So Mike, maybe there’s a reason you didn’t get to go to the NFL. He knew you were going to be a jerk and He had better plans for you than that. I’m pretty sure you’ve influenced, educated, and made many people a better person just by meeting you and/or knowing you along the way.

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